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 I don\'t think I\'ve told you guys this

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MonitorTheSmellOfRain

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PostSubject: I don't think I've told you guys this   Mon Nov 03, 2008 8:00 pm

But about a week ago or so my brother eloped. Instead of him moving out, his wife moved in with us.

I'm trying really hard to love my new sister-in-law, but it's hard. It's just awkward. I didn't really have time to get to know her, and she is just so different than the rest of my siblings it's hard to fit her in. Help me out. How do you love someone?

Edit: The thing I really don't like is now when I'm on the computer I can't sing/dance along with my music. Since she doesn't have a job she's always here, and I don't want to be singing and dancing around in my seat and have her come around and see me.


Last edited by MonitorTSOR on Mon Nov 03, 2008 8:31 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Gabstah
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PostSubject: Re: I don\'t think I\'ve told you guys this   Mon Nov 03, 2008 8:30 pm

Weird.

I guess just try and find some common ground with her? Ask if she wants to watch a movie with you, etc.

I don't see how your brother is ready to be married if he's still living at home though :/ how old are they?

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MonitorTheSmellOfRain

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PostSubject: Re: I don\'t think I\'ve told you guys this   Mon Nov 03, 2008 8:35 pm

Gabstah wrote:
Weird.

I guess just try and find some common ground with her? Ask if she wants to watch a movie with you, etc.

I don't see how your brother is ready to be married if he's still living at home though :/ how old are they?

I have no idea how old she is, but he's around 32ish. He used to live on his own, but my mom basically pressured him to come back home and he never left.

I agree with you, though. But it was kinda like a if-we're-going-to-do-it-we-have-to-do-it-now type of situation. They had been previously engaged but had to break it off because she's a Jehova's Witness so she's apparently not allowed to marry him. But then I guess they decided to just quickly get married before her parents could step in again.

But seriously, he's not ready to be married. He doesn't even have a car.


Although I guess I should clear something up. Yes, they're living with us, but it's kinda like they're not. My house is really weird. It's a house and then it has an appartment attatched to it. They are living in the downstairs of the apartment (one of my other brothers is living in the upstairs, but he'll probably be moving over to the actual house soon since my sister is moving out), so it's like they live in our house, but they don't. It's basically they live in an apartment but use our bathroom and kitchen.
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PostSubject: Re: I don\'t think I\'ve told you guys this   Mon Nov 03, 2008 8:38 pm

MonitorTSOR wrote:
Gabstah wrote:
Weird.

I guess just try and find some common ground with her? Ask if she wants to watch a movie with you, etc.

I don't see how your brother is ready to be married if he's still living at home though :/ how old are they?

I have no idea how old she is, but he's around 32ish. He used to live on his own, but my mom basically pressured him to come back home and he never left.

I agree with you, though. But it was kinda like a if-we're-going-to-do-it-we-have-to-do-it-now type of situation. They had been previously engaged but had to break it off because she's a Jehova's Witness so she's apparently not allowed to marry him. But then I guess they decided to just quickly get married before her parents could step in again.

But seriously, he's not ready to be married. He doesn't even have a car.


Although I guess I should clear something up. Yes, they're living with us, but it's kinda like they're not. My house is really weird. It's a house and then it has an appartment attatched to it. They are living in the downstairs of the apartment (one of my other brothers is living in the upstairs, but he'll probably be moving over to the actual house soon since my sister is moving out), so it's like they live in our house, but they don't. It's basically they live in an apartment but use our bathroom and kitchen.

okay, that makes a bit more sense. still a tiny bit weird, but everyone is a little different.
i don't know how to like someone though :/ i guess just try to include her in family events? i mean of course she'll BE THERE for family events but try to make her feel welcome and stuff, and the more she likes you then the easier it'll be for you to like her.

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MonitorTheSmellOfRain

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PostSubject: Re: I don\'t think I\'ve told you guys this   Mon Nov 03, 2008 8:41 pm

Gabstah wrote:
MonitorTSOR wrote:
Gabstah wrote:
Weird.

I guess just try and find some common ground with her? Ask if she wants to watch a movie with you, etc.

I don't see how your brother is ready to be married if he's still living at home though :/ how old are they?

I have no idea how old she is, but he's around 32ish. He used to live on his own, but my mom basically pressured him to come back home and he never left.

I agree with you, though. But it was kinda like a if-we're-going-to-do-it-we-have-to-do-it-now type of situation. They had been previously engaged but had to break it off because she's a Jehova's Witness so she's apparently not allowed to marry him. But then I guess they decided to just quickly get married before her parents could step in again.

But seriously, he's not ready to be married. He doesn't even have a car.


Although I guess I should clear something up. Yes, they're living with us, but it's kinda like they're not. My house is really weird. It's a house and then it has an appartment attatched to it. They are living in the downstairs of the apartment (one of my other brothers is living in the upstairs, but he'll probably be moving over to the actual house soon since my sister is moving out), so it's like they live in our house, but they don't. It's basically they live in an apartment but use our bathroom and kitchen.

okay, that makes a bit more sense. still a tiny bit weird, but everyone is a little different.
i don't know how to like someone though :/ i guess just try to include her in family events? i mean of course she'll BE THERE for family events but try to make her feel welcome and stuff, and the more she likes you then the easier it'll be for you to like her.
Haha, actually, she won't be included in family events. Pretty much the only family events we have are celebrating holidays/birthdays. Since she's a JW, she's not allowed to celebrate those.

Although, my other sister-in-law is having a babyshower on Saturday and she's going to that, which I'm shocked she's allowed to go to.
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PostSubject: Re: I don\'t think I\'ve told you guys this   Mon Nov 03, 2008 8:43 pm

MonitorTSOR wrote:

Haha, actually, she won't be included in family events. Pretty much the only family events we have are celebrating holidays/birthdays. Since she's a JW, she's not allowed to celebrate those.

Although, my other sister-in-law is having a babyshower on Saturday and she's going to that, which I'm shocked she's allowed to go to.

Oh JWs, they're so weird. Funny that she got married although it was against her church's rules, but isn't going to celebrate someone's birthday - seems to be a little bit on the "less" sinful side, but whatever. I'm not judging, JWs just confuse me a lot.

allowed to by who? does she still speak to her family?

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MonitorTheSmellOfRain

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PostSubject: Re: I don\'t think I\'ve told you guys this   Mon Nov 03, 2008 8:50 pm

Gabstah wrote:
MonitorTSOR wrote:

Haha, actually, she won't be included in family events. Pretty much the only family events we have are celebrating holidays/birthdays. Since she's a JW, she's not allowed to celebrate those.

Although, my other sister-in-law is having a babyshower on Saturday and she's going to that, which I'm shocked she's allowed to go to.

Oh JWs, they're so weird. Funny that she got married although it was against her church's rules, but isn't going to celebrate someone's birthday - seems to be a little bit on the "less" sinful side, but whatever. I'm not judging, JWs just confuse me a lot.

allowed to by who? does she still speak to her family?
I know, I don't really get it. Although I suppose if you actually do love someone (although I honestly have no clue why she loves my brother) you don't care.

I think it's basically just her Mom that is a firm JW. I'm almost positive she's on good terms with her sister. My brother works with her sister, so that would have been really awkward if they weren't okay.
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PostSubject: Re: I don\'t think I\'ve told you guys this   Mon Nov 03, 2008 8:57 pm

MonitorTSOR wrote:
Gabstah wrote:
MonitorTSOR wrote:

Haha, actually, she won't be included in family events. Pretty much the only family events we have are celebrating holidays/birthdays. Since she's a JW, she's not allowed to celebrate those.

Although, my other sister-in-law is having a babyshower on Saturday and she's going to that, which I'm shocked she's allowed to go to.

Oh JWs, they're so weird. Funny that she got married although it was against her church's rules, but isn't going to celebrate someone's birthday - seems to be a little bit on the "less" sinful side, but whatever. I'm not judging, JWs just confuse me a lot.

allowed to by who? does she still speak to her family?
I know, I don't really get it. Although I suppose if you actually do love someone (although I honestly have no clue why she loves my brother) you don't care.

I think it's basically just her Mom that is a firm JW. I'm almost positive she's on good terms with her sister. My brother works with her sister, so that would have been really awkward if they weren't okay.

Yeah for sure. Stuh-range situation!

I really have no more advice to give to you though, sorry :/ haha good luck with that. i'm living with my brother and his fiance and they get married in may and we'll still be living together but it won't be as awkward as that.

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PostSubject: Re: I don\'t think I\'ve told you guys this   Mon Nov 03, 2008 9:05 pm

Take her out shopping or for ice cream this weekend.
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PostSubject: Re: I don\'t think I\'ve told you guys this   Mon Nov 03, 2008 11:26 pm

hopefully it'll get better, that sucks though, at least for now. i can't imagine my brother getting married, let alone gettin gmarried and staying here with the lady
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PostSubject: Re: I don\'t think I\'ve told you guys this   Tue Nov 04, 2008 2:07 pm

That sucks. Keep in mind, though, that it must be really awkward for her to have moved in with her new husband's family. Maybe you could throw a grillout thing with everyone. I don't know.
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